You can get with this or you can get with that

My kids are old enough to walk home from school, as long as the oldest (12) is with them. They mostly do a good job. They come home everyday relatively unscathed, so I’m calling it a win. 

 

The other day, my 5-year old proudly came in and handed me a dandelion. “I picked you a flower!”

 

I was extremely touched by his gesture, even if he did just plop a half dead weed on my desk. 

 

Then, a few days later, we were driving down the road and he exclaimed “look at all of the flowers!” 

 

Before I could stop myself, I said “those aren’t really flowers, they’re dandelions. Just weeds.” 

 

Damn. I crushed his joy. Parenting fail.

 

“Well I don’t care if they are weeds. They’re so beautiful” he said.

 

Okay. Phew. I put my “World's Worst Mother” award away for another day.

 

As adults, we are so much more likely to see the negatives rather than the positives. 

 

Yes - dandelions infest our beautiful grass, and are a pain to remove, but they are also a sign of spring, apparently they are pretty good in tea, and have potential benefits for your health and the bees! (Please don’t go eating dandelions without doing your research). 

 

Adulthood is a thief of joy. There is so much responsibility in adulthood. You have to cook for yourself, clean all the time, work, do laundry. 

 

And the bills. Ugh the bills. And not in the fun Destiny’s Child kind of way. Actual bills to keep your lights on and to keep the water running.

 

Five year olds have the pleasure of seeing the world for its beauty, without the stress of adulthood. They aren’t in a hurry because they can’t even tell time. They don’t have a preconceived view of dandelions. They have the ability to look at them, and decide for themselves. They see a lawn full of beautiful yellow flowers, and we see a pesky chore. Another thing added to the dreaded “to do” list.

 

Seeing the world through the eyes of a child isn’t always possible and it certainly isn’t easy. There’s a reason we lose that childlike wonder and adoration of the world around us as we grow up. We have experience. We’ve seen the dark side of adulthood and it’s a hard place to come back from. But you can practise gratitude. You can choose to see the positives and the silver linings, even in a field full of dandelions (bonus if they aren’t in your backyard). 

 

Tony Robbins says “energy flows where attention goes”. I think he’s actually talking about achieving extraordinary business achievements, but it applies to this too. The more you focus on seeing the good, the more good you’ll see. 

 

I’m not saying you have to be grateful for your bills. This isn’t a “there’s starving people in Africa” guilt trip type of thing. Everyone has challenges, and just because other peoples’ challenges might be bigger, it doesn’t make yours any less valid. 

 

The point is, bills suck. You can let the bills steal your joy, or you can sit down and pay them with a hot cup of coffee, or your favourite T.V. show to make it more enjoyable. The choice is yours.